So, I’ve finally done it, the thing I’ve most wanted to do, but didn’t have the guts to do until now. I’ve given notice at my full-time job and will be taking at least three months off to focus on fiction writing.
I’ve dreamed of doing this for years, but didn’t have the courage to quit a full-time job with the seduction of a regular salary and benefits. Why now? I think I’d finally hit a point where I couldn’t stand to have my personal and professional lives so disparate. At work, I’m one person, wearing pantsuits and trying to play the role of marketing communications manager for an insurance company. But deep down, I knew that that wasn’t me, the artist, writer in me had been squashed. But the writer demanded to be freed. She kept saying, stop waiting for the perfect time to pursue your dreams. There is no perfect time. The only time is now.
So now it is.
It took a while for my boss to come around to the fact that I’ve given notice. He was shocked and surprised. More shocked and surprised than I thought he’d be. Once he got used to the idea, he seemed a little jealous. I’m taking the plunge to do what most people only dream about doing.
It is scary. A few nights ago, I was talking to a friend who casually mentioned how much he has saved up to put a down payment down on a condo. I felt a pang of jealousy. By quiting my job, the dream of buying a home of my own is on hold for some time. But then I reminded myself that I could have bought a condo if that is what I really wanted to do, but it isn’t. I don’t want to be tied to a mortgage and obligations, other than those to myself. I want to pursue my life’s work – write my books, pursue an MFA in creative writing and teach writing. Share my passion for the written word.
This is my life’s work. To record and make sense of my experiences in fiction and non-fiction. I hold onto the idea that others share my experience.